who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
Randomize
