...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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