Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
