Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
