i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
You don't make any sense
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