So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
i think i have two assholes
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I had to cum in my sink.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Randomize