Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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