True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
stop calling my apartment porn island.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
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