I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
