you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
