I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
