I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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