i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
Randomize
