Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
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