dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Still dying that you shit outside
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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