I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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