i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
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