I look better un-naked...
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
Randomize
