After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
