Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
Randomize
