I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
We just shotgunned beers for America
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
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