you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Randomize