i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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