Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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