I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
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