Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
