Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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