ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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