There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
Randomize
