Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
