No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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