Three words: puerto rican gang bang
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
How does one acquire holy water?
Randomize
