does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Randomize
