her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
I just got carded by a ten year old.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
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