I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Semen is not good for contacts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize