You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
