The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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