so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
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