Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
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Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
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I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
I'm always down for nudity.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize