Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
where does the pee come out of this thing
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
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He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.