You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
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