I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
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