We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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