we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Randomize
