What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Boobs speak an international language.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
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