maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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