Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Randomize
