Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Randomize
