Where did you get a picture of my penis
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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