I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
We have so much sex to catch up on
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Randomize
